Therapists and relationship coaches explain why dating at middle age comes with its own set of challenges. Remember when dating was about meeting a potential mate through a friend and getting to know them over dinner and a movie? You might be reemerging on the dating scene following a long hiatus, perhaps after being divorced or widowed—only to find that the rules and technology of the game have changed. In fact, there are many particular challenges that come with dating as a something.
The women are beautiful, the men are charismatic and you begin to wonder to yourself, how can I be in that party? The reason people find groups like the one I just mentioned so attractive is because of the vibe it gives off. A group that people want to be a part of is one that has no ulterior motives other than just having fun in the moment. Creating the vibe is easy — just go out with no expectations and have fun! One should never underestimate the power your friends have to sway the opinions of others.
This is a big mistake! You probably will not get a different result in any of the relationships. Look outside of where you have easy access to. Look for someone that will look at you as something new and exotic.
To add to this, we share the same tight social circle that meets multiple times per week for different outings. I have been keeping my distance from the group so far. While I don't want to lose touch with this circle of friends, I also feel that seeing her would add to my pain and discomfort. Has anyone been in a similar situation and how did you handle it? It's tough, because you feel like a great big loser, and worse, you feel like everybody else is thinking, wow, why do we hang out with this loser?